Being Rebekah Herzberg Is Mostly Awesome

When November rolls around I like to list everything I am thankful for over the span of 10 months. I already made a few 'thankful' posts earlier and I am too busy to cover everything that has happened so if I leave any events or friends out, my bad dudes. On to the list of things I have been involved with, thankful for, etc etc etc....

The rough draft for the Hanukkillah script has been finished. More updates on that soon. Work keeps me pretty busy and this move into the new house has been draining. BUT I still find time to let photographers take pretty pictures of me. Some of these are behind the scenes and some are finishing touches by Darryl James.

This back drop is REAL! Downtown PA

We found a bar in the old hotel & I'm a bartender so ya...

Notice the coffee cup

I went to New York for Comicon, Judas Priest, and a few other events. Got to spend time with my bestie Torrani, Ted, and the lovely wife Bev. Also, got to spend more time with the Soskas. I planned on writing about my entire experience but I had serious jet lag and now much of the excitement has faded. I am getting old.

Journalists, I highly recommend getting the 4-Day Pro pass

Like I said before, work keeps me busy and around this time of the year I get a lot of requests to be a guest on local radio shows or to be interviewed in magazines to discuss Halloween-themed cocktails. The Beaumont Enterprise wrote two different articles that featured me this year where I talked about proper bar etiquette in one and the other article focused on "The Booziest Spots in Beaumont." The club Temptations, where I currently bartend, made it to #11. The old pub also made it to the list with the photo they took of me for the magazine Cat5 last Halloween. FNTX had me on their show a few months ago where I was asked to bring in a couple of my favorite dancers from the club and we discussed "The Real Ladies of the Night." They asked me to come back on the show where I made some Halloween-themed cocktails while we were live on the air. One of these is MY OWN RECIPE that's Underworld inspired, "The Corvinus Gene."

I love my co-workers. We are all so handsome. I still have to brag about how awesome my job is.

I was a Ghostbuster for Halloween

I still have my VHS column for Geek Juice and I love my boys! We have created a new theme show, Sex Ed With Geek Juice. The first show had several listeners on the GJ website. We did a short addition with The Cinema Snob's Brad Jones joining us.

Looking back at how awesome this year has been, it makes me realize just how privileged I am and all the cool shit I get to do. I get to interview and hang out with filmmakers and artists that I looked up to when I was a kid and continue to look up to. I have more than one amazing job. I have amazing friends. Amazing co-workers. An amazing boyfriend and above all things, AMAZING CHILDREN! I still cannot believe I actually made it to TV as well. Now that I think about it, it's no wonder I get attacked online by strange females that I never heard of. Jealousy makes people do crazy things and I forgive you all. Stay tuned for more updates AND I will see you all in Austin, November 16th for the VHS swap meet! Glad I got these built in shelves for my clams.

Redmond, Washington

Who are you and why do you keep reading my posts every day? Even older posts? Are you a fan or some deranged stalker? I have legitimate reasons for asking this question.

How NOT to Run a Convention: Learn From the Epic Con Disaster

Before I start I feel I must clarify the reasoning behind my interest with Epic Con since it's nowhere near Texas and I was not involved with the con in anyway. I'm not here to point at laugh at the promoter's failures. The reason why I am wasting 20 minutes typing my reaction up on my personal blog is simple. Not only am I disgusted by the promoter's behavior online, I feel I should point out how NOT to run your convention and I would like to stick up for my supporters who were mistreated by the con. I am not a convention 'expert' by any means but I have been attending cons for years, appeared as a guest at cons, hosted cons, and I have actually put together conventions in the past. It is a very stressful experience. This is why you need a team. Epic Con didn't seem to have a team or much of a staff for that matter.

So here's a list I compiled of things NOT to do when you are running a convention:

1. Do not breach over 30 contracts then turn around and claim the guests 'canceled' for reasons other than your deceitfulness. You are obligated to pay for their air fare and hotel rooms. This is the most important thing on the list.

2. Marketing and presentation are also very important. The organizers failed to promote properly.

3. Do NOT promise elegant dining then give the VIP's cold cuts in a setting that looks nothing like what was promised.

4. Do not take donations from the vendors to pay for the guest's' VIP cold cuts. The vendors are already broke from wasting all their money on the hotel rooms, plane tickets, and small vendor space you have provided. This is completely unprofessional.

5. Do not complain on Facebook that your daughter had to spend $1, 000 on the sandwiches and cry about how the people are unappreciative. I'm sorry your daughter is out $1, 000 (If that is even true) but what about all the money that the guests and vendors lost from your shitty convention? You do not seem to care about them.

6. It's imperative that you not only make a sincere and mature public response but you also need to contact these individuals directly by phone or email. Instead, these people were denied answers to their questions and the public received an immature rant filled with lies and blame had been placed on everyone else. YOU are responsible. To place blame on others for your failure is insulting.

7. Do not respond "Hmmmm" and "LOLOLOL" to the questions. It makes you look like an illiterate buffoon. For the love of God, come up with a better response and do not add 'per say' to the end of your sentences. When people threaten you with a lawsuit you do not respond with, "LOL, okay hmmmmm." Mark Patton just did an interview for a local news station where he expressed that he is in fact taking them to court. Who is laughing now?

8. When people ask where the money from all the ticket sales went, answer them. That money had to go somewhere. If it couldn't pay for sandwiches then God only knows….

9. The organizers claimed that the proceeds were being donated to a foundation. Curious individuals were not convinced so they called the foundation and they claimed they had no idea the convention was using their name. This is a heartless act and you should be ashamed.

10. The amazing Tom Sullivan asked the organizer's husband who goes by the name 'Kev Diabolique'  why they didn't pay for the guest's air fare. Kev never responded to Tom. He proceeded to argue and name call with another individual. I guess he was embarrassed.

11. Attendees, vendors, guests, and people who had helped out with the convention came forward to complain that Sheri Yarbrough was insulting and low class. Always remain respectful and courteous no matter how stressed you may be. Take a look at Loyd Cryer, that is one cool mother fucker and he has to deal with a lot of bullshit when putting Texas Frightmare Weekend together. This man always goes out of his way to make sure everyone is pleased and has what they need. He also manages to put together a great staff. Epic Con didn't have any staff members with t-shirts or security guards, which was promised.

12. When 'Kev' was making an ass of himself on the Facebook page, a woman kindly asked him to respond to her email where she requested a refund for her booth and the man wouldn't even respond to her comment or her emails. I don't even need to explain to you how wrong this is.

13. Do not pretend to be a fan of the convention and post a positive review on the con's Facebook page when you are one of the promoters. Low class. You totally got busted there Kev.

14. The vendors shouldn't have to set up their tables.

15. It's unfair to delete the comments on the promotional page where some of the celebrity guests rightfully expressed their concerns and the treatment they received. Even Barbie Wilde's comments were deleted. Allow the public to say their peace.

16. If your health is declining, you can always reschedule the event and apologize.

17. Learn the difference between libel and slander.

18. Do not use your 'health' problems as an excuse for your failures. People make mistakes but illness or no, it's never okay to promise things you cannot deliver without any warning or apology.

19. Ignoring the problem will not make it go away. It makes you an ass hole and no one will work with you again.

20. If you are unable to financially handle a convention, it's not appropriate to buy autographs.

21. Oh my God, you cannot just ask people why they are white.

Trust No Bitch

It's six a.m. I haven't been to sleep. Sleeping meds are the only meds that don't seem to work on me and why should they since I'm nocturnal as fuck. My mind races with a quixotic synthesis of disgust, contempt, bitterness, and optimism accompanied by feelings of confusion and amenity. How can so many things be so wrong and so right at the same time? One one hand, I have never been happier and I truly feel I am on the right path. On the other, I feel pained and unsure. I don't think people ever stop to think what the person standing beside them has gone through or is going through. I hear a lot of complaining over minuscule situations that I would gladly trade with. There are a lot of BAD things that have happened to me and there are bad things that are still happening to me and I have no choice but to sit back and take it but what is life without a little pain and suffering? Since I can remember, everyone in my life has had control over what I wear, how I act, where I go, who I know, religion, and my chosen profession. Every relationship I've been in was overshadowed by insecurity, emotional larceny, and dominance until recently. I felt as if the world had such a tight grip on me, it would squeeze and squeeze the life out of me and I couldn't breathe.

From time to time I think about giving in to those insecurities and power. I have quit bartending, modeling, film, and everything else I love so many times I cannot keep count. Why should I let them win? What's so wrong with what I am doing? I have fished out advice from my fellow bartender friends and my friends that wait tables who are also single parents. In no way am I in the wrong. I provide stability and a roof over my children's heads. I do not do drugs and I do not go out 'partying.' It's rare that I actually ask for a weekend off and it's rare that my bosses will even give me a Friday or Saturday night off. In the past the ideas of my 'partying too much in pictures' has come across which I never understood because I've been a bartender for 10 years for Christ's sakes. It's only natural that people take dozens of pictures with me at work and there is also NOTHING wrong with a parent taking a night off to their-self every once in a while. My son didn't even spend a single night away from me until he was over 2 and that was incredibly hard for me.

I am also not out 'slutting it up.' This girl is a long-term kind of girl. You go from one relationship to the next, quickly, and suddenly you're viewed as a whore. I've already been divorced, and to an abusive misogynist at that. I'm not making the same mistake twice. It took a while for me to find a man who is supportive of my work and secure with himself and I think I may keep this one around. What is so wrong with that? Why should I be forced to marry someone who makes me feel bad? I shouldn't and people should mind their own fucking business. I am not ready to cut my bartending career. I'm not ready to give up modeling and I'm definitely not stepping away from the horror industry. You can try to hold me back from my dreams all you want. I'm going to come out on top with a smile on my face and at the end of the day you will just be another uptight, miserable ass hole. In a way I feel privileged because I get to do things so many are not capable of. I followed my dream, succeeded, and did this with two children. What did you guys do? Nothing.

Aside from having terrible taste in men, I seem to have terrible taste in girlfriends as well. There are two girls that were my best friends for years. I allowed these vapid tramps to walk all over me and turn right around and act like I was the problem. Sharing private information with mutual parties and attacking your friend with sinister definition and distortion are NOT amid the practices of real friendship. Faking an illness, due to excessive drinking, then throwing a tantrum when your best friend calls you out for being dramatic are NOT amid the practices of real friendship. No other individual on this Earth would ever walk through fire and support these girls the way that I so blindingly did and it's never going to happen again. I love my friends but I have to keep myself closed off. I'm just tired of the bullshit. All I want in life is to work, take care of my kids, and have a supportive man by my side. I don't need anything else. I suppose I do need the support of my friends but you're all going to be kept in the dark when it comes to my personal endeavors. Obviously, I have trust issues. The two of you should go bowling.

While I'm at it, if someone tells you that you need to pick sides, this person is on a whole other plane that's not perpendicular to reality and they're insecure - There's that word again. Life doesn't work that way. Grow up. I don't know what the future has in store for me but if you're going to attempt to control my future or become a distraction then there's no reason for you to be in it.

Octoberfest Recommendations

With Octoberfest inching its way into our lives I have decided to whip up a batch of lively horror films to watch all month long. However, I am not 102% content with the list. There are so many flavors out there and one cannot merely compile a list of 20. How about a list of 200? This is your first batch of films to watch while you sip on that craft beer and munch on stale popcorn that lacks the desired measure of butter and garlic salt. In no particular order......

(Anguish-1987) Incredibly bizarre and original horror film within a horror film brought to us by Spanish director Bigas Luna with Zelda Rubinstein doing what she does best, crawling in the audiences skin and giving you that cold feeling in your stomach. There's a lot of trickery and hypnosis in place. I'm not a fan of mind-altering substances but if you are, watch this film under the influence then get back to me. I am dying to know the results.

(The Boneyard-1991)  On my quest to find rare VHS gems that have somehow managed to remain on open video store shelves I came across this hilarious cover and I couldn't believe that I have no memory of seeing this cover on the shelves so many moons ago. I am surrounded by all these familiar titles, grabbing what I could fit into my arms, then….. WHAT THE FUCK…. Is that a fucking poodle? There are actually two covers, this yellow poodle being the comedy and the black cover representing the horror elements. It's a blood-soaked, boisterous laughfest and every Halloween party should have one. There's a monster poodle for fucks sake. 

(Brain Scan-1994) Ultimately one of my favorite horror films of all time. The computer graphics are exquisite. It has one of the best horror movie scores of all time and this is a film that truly caters to the horror fans. Of all films on this list, watch this one first.

(Cat People-1988) Sex. Big cats. Incest. Malcolm McDowell. Natassja Kinski. David Bowie. Need I say more?

(Children of the Night-1991) Two chicks have this ritual where they swim in an abandoned church crypt (that sounds like fun) and one of the gals drops her crucifix on an old vampire's head awakening him and he takes over the small town. It's ridiculously corny but a genuine vampire flick with the late Karen Black.

(Blacker Than the Night - 1975) Also known as Darker Than the Night, this Spanish horror film is a tale of four women who move into a house that one of the girl's inherited. Her Aunt's spirit still haunts the home and she's absolutely pissed when the girls kill her cat. The film is void of gore and special effects but the chilling atmosphere and acting make up for it. There are a couple of hair raising moments.

(Darkness-1993) This is what I'm talking about! Not all Shot-On-Shiteo films are bad. Vampires, check! Mullets, check! Chainsaws, check! Exploding heads, double check! Buckets of blood and piles of entrails, FUCKING TRIPLE CHECK! If you're a student interested in making your own horror film I highly suggest you do your homework, starting with this sick flick that's easily the goriest vampire film ever made and the director, Leif Jonker, was only 19 at the time!

(Deadly Blessing-1981) Wes Craven is a God. A God I tell you! This eerie entry has several notable actors including Sharon Sone, Michael Berryman, and Ernest Borgnine. Even the annoying Patty Simcox (Susan Buckner) from Grease makes the cast. The film is easily forgettable and I don't know why.

(Demons-1985) Earlier I mentioned Anguish being a horror film within a horror film. Demons is another film that takes place in a movie theater where demons devour and possess the West Berlin attendees. Italian horror films are among my favorites and they're the most brutal. These Italian directors are able to make death look so beautiful and that's something that little Americans have mastered. Okay, maybe not the green puss scene but everything else is spectacular to look at! Rebekah doesn't do green puss. Do not consume food when watching this movie!

(Halloween 3-1982) I am so sick of people giving the third installment shit due to Michael Myer's absence. You may find this film on my list every year because it's actually a brutal film that targets children and one of the child's deaths is so graphic, I'm surprised they got away with it. Originally, the Halloween franchise was suppose to focus on several different villains. That never happened. Only in the third one is Myers absent. The story focuses on the bad ass Tom Atkins who tries to take down a Halloween mask producing company that is run by witches…. Errr robots…. whatever the fuck they are. The company's goal is to kill every child in America.

(Near Dark-1987) Here's one for my Texan vampire fans! Around every corner is a unique vampire flick with style. This is the only film on my list directed by a woman. Not to worry, wait until the next list!

(Night of the Demons-1988) I know, I know. "You put this on your list every year!" Well that's because it's my favorite horror film of all time and it takes place on Halloween you pretentious pubic hair. Where else are you going to see a fully nude girl inserting lipstick into her nipple? N-O-W-H-E-R-E!

(The People Under the Stairs-1991) Wes Craven graces my list more than any other horror director. The man knows how to please a lady. He speaks to my heart. Sean Whalen is gross but this film is outrageously underrated. Incest. A little black boy named 'Fool' as the heroine. Ving Rhames. Booby traps. Leather body suits. Racial slurs. Child abuse. Pale, inbred children that turn to cannibalism and a mean dog named Prince. Dig it.

(Pin-1988) A brother and sister live together with a wooden dummy named 'Pin" that tells the brother to do things. This psychological horror film is unlike anything you have ever seen. A feeling of dread will creep over you then you will find yourself asking, "What the fuck did I just watch?"

(Poison for the Fairies-1984) Deadly fable that focuses on two annoying girls. One being bat shit crazy and the other being manipulated by her friend that believes she is a witch. Child on child murder. Brilliant cinematography. Winner of the Mexican Academy Awards.

(Popcorn-1991) Yet another horror film that takes place in a movie theater. I swear I am not doing this on purpose! The premise is silly but the deaths are lucrative and people seem to think that horror films hibernated in the 90s. I seem to remember several goodies from the 90s. These people have no clue what they're talking about. I like to pair this entry with Society.

(The Sentinel-1977) Guaranteed to give you a heart attack. The mom in the National Lampoons Vacation films (Beverly D'Angelo) shows her bewbs and masturbates in an off-putting scene. Chris Sarandon, Cristina Raines, Christopher Walken, Ava Gardner, Tom Berender, Jeff Goldblum, and John Carradine are among the cast.

(Sometimes They Come Back-1991) Octoberfest wouldn't be right without a little Stephen King now, would it? What started out as a short story turned into one of the better films plucked from the King's work. Tim Matheson and his family move back to his hometown where he is being harassed by teenagers that were killed after murdering his older brother when he was a kid. This event has been haunting him his entire life and now he has a chance to put the demons behind him. Unfortunately, it's not just a haunting. The dead greasers are picking off teens left and right for shits and giggles and they strive to murder Jim to keep themselves out of hell. It sounds silly but this is a spooky film that I look forward to watching again for the first time in 10 years.

(The Blob-1988) One of the better remakes floating around out there with Saw's Shawnee Smith in the lead. If you love science fiction then you need to get a load of this gooey killing machine. It's gory and the action is non-stop.

(Triangle-2009) Never mind that weird thing going on with Melissa George's mouth. This is another original entry that doesn't receive the respect it deserves. A group of friends have a yacht accident in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean and find an abandoned ship where they are doomed to experience torment over and over and over again. It's like.... totally outrageous..... Like JEM outrageous. Truly, truly, truly outrageous.